I can't remember how old I am

Today is my birthday.

It's very convenient to start a new year and a new age at the same time. I celebrate a new year on January 1st and January 3rd. I've always loved my birth date.

Looking back on this year the thing I remember most is that I went to work. Then when I got off of work I went to work again, just at a different job. Then when I got off work again, I went home and worked more. I remember exhaustion. I remember a lot of tears. I remember feeling completely lost. I remember feeling like I'd lost myself, my sense of humor, my ability to have fun, my ability to manage my life. I remember feeling a lot like this.

But, I also remember a family I can't get enough of, parents who were more understanding and compassionate than I ever knew they could be, sisters and friends who'd walk to hell and back with me just so I'd have a shoulder to cry on, friend's parents who worry about me like I am one of their own, a bishop who let me cry about my job/financial/life situation every time I walked into his office and never made me feel embarrassed about it, a friend who loved me without even knowing my name (may she rest in peace), being able to simultaneously call 3 different people my 'best friend'. I remember Switzerland & Spain, puzzles and pictures. I remember being happy. I remember being hopeful.

Thank you, 2010.

In 2011, 33 year old me will nurture my spirituality, work less, work smarter, have more fun, lots more fun, be more adventurous, take care of my body, take care of my home and take the one big risk I was too scared to take in 2010.

The first song I listened to in 2011 and my theme song for the year: